With the announcement that he is withdrawing from the Minnesota governor’s race, Tim Walz is on the hunt for a new career. Fortunately, The Babylon Bee has come up with the following list of jobs he’d be absolutely fabulous for:

1. Learning Center Director: These have flourished into multi-billion-dollar businesses under his watch.
2. Chief counselor at the “Pray Away The Straight” camp: What a perfect fit.
3. One of those wacky inflatable tube men at a car dealership: He’s already doing the motions. Might as well get paid.
4. Supervisor of the tampon dispenser at a men’s correctional facility: He’s the world’s foremost expert on stocking feminine products in masculine spaces.
5. Head coach for the Minnesota Vikings: Run that pick-six, Timmy.
6. Member of the Village People: He would reportedly prefer to be the one who wears leather chaps.
7. Perverted uncle impersonator: It’s a niche market, but who could be better?
8. President of Somalia: A natural transition.

Ol’ Tim is certain to land on his feet somewhere. What other jobs would be perfect for him?

The Babylon Bee